You know you're on to something when the famous players start stealin' your licks!

Notice how Terry Lawless is 'casually' filming Jim Alfredson and saying to himself, "That's how you do that!"

Old School Bars

God, I miss bars like this: vinyl everywhere, easy and comfortable to sit at (yeah, I'm digging at high style bar tables and really strange seats - and I like modern furniture as much as the next guy but, seriously, some of these stools make me want to go grab an axe).  Sure, it's super cheesy now, but it's cozy to sit under plastic covered plants that don't require watering - or dusting, evidently - and I doubt that most carpenters these days (at least the ones that I can afford) could even built an overhang like that.

As for the drinking, your choice for wine is either white or red.  Got that, pal?  If you're drinking beer, then's it's one draft coming up!  Hell, in those days, we were all too tired from laying brick or fixing that steel railroad bridge to spend ten minutes reading over a damn three page wine and beer list anyway.

Oh, this one is at Roma's Pizza on Franklin Boulevard, Sacramento, California.

And they thought we were crazy.

Remember when the rest of the U.S. said that California was the Land of Fruits and Nuts?  Looks to me like the GOP has that title from now on.  Listening to Texans on NPR yesterday continue to doubt Obama's legitimacy as President since we 'still haven't seen the birth certificate' is all I need to hear to confirm that we on the glorious West Coast are now the sane ones.

It's been a while since I've posted and much of that time can be attributed to the INSANE amount of hoops Google made me jump through in order to log back in.  If you think the State of California has troubles with simplifying things, they ain't got nothin' on these guys.  So much for billions of dollars making things simple.  Hell, Cosmo - that's him, above - could design a simpler method for re-activating an account and he works for carrots!

Trump proves the Left was right!

On behalf of millions of left wingers everywhere, I would like to make the following public service announcement: "We told you so!"

Now that the Birthers and, for that matter, most of the conservative population, has been proven to be conspiratorial idiots, hopefully people will stop listening to anything they have to say.

Thank you, Donald Trump. I officially forgive your hair.

Bonds Guilty! Mirror, mirror on the wall...

So what if he lied? I don't know one person who could stand before any judge or jury (or their friends and family for that matter) and honestly say that they haven't done at least one of these: told a lie, rolled through a stop sign, exceeded the speed limit, cheated on taxes or their spouse or significant other, lied to their parents, slipped in late for work and didn't dock their time card. We're all hypocrites and just can't admit it to yourselves and you know it. It's easy to sit here in almost complete anonymity and post a scathing Bonds condemnation. But, try to live up to your own words and you'll fall flat on your face, much to the enjoyment of the rest of the world who clearly are waiting for the next victim to pounce upon.

Anyway, I'm calling in sick and driving over to my mistress' place in my state-subsidized foreign auto, using her neighbors guest parking permit to avoid getting a ticket in that '2 Hour' only zone, to have my Cuban cigar, a Stoli martini and then have non-missionary style, forbidden sex while listening to my favorite Gothic Death Metal band on my office's Mac Book Pro. Gotta go. See ya!

Twitter Attack Victims Get Their Life Back

Millions of Twitter and Facebook users unexpectedly regained temporary control of their lives as the result of a distribute denial-of-service (DDoS) attack that brought traffic on these sites to a standstill. Although the attacks were apparently targeting one man, a Georgian activist, known by the online handle Cyxymu, who uses blogs and social media sites like Twitter and Facebook to express views related to the tensions between Russia and Georgia, the end result was millions of - at first - disgruntled users. It didn't take long for for them to realize that a major paradigm shift had occurred.

With this new windfall of freedom, Facebook's "Friends," and users of Twitter, "Tweeters" as they are often called, suddenly realized that not only were their lives not over but were actually enhances by the situation. Johnny Rockpile of Sacramento, California expressed his joy at the discovery this way: "I didn't think it was possible to sit down and have a drink with my friends without telling my three followers what I was doing. But now, my real friends and I can talk to each other about sports and our girlfriends without having to use my thumbs. Wow! Who knew?"

Although businesses which rely upon Twitter's network for the distribution to clients were severely affected by the attacks, economists agreed that most of these businesses weren't making any money anyway, so the impact was largely minor on the economy in general with several industry leaders admitting that maybe they will now look for real jobs that make meanful contributions to society. Donny Draxton of Colorado admitted as much by explaining that he really only started his "Follow This Dollar Bill," online business site as a way to "spend less time with his family and more 'garage time.' It was working out great until this happened, although I spent more on beer than I ever did on buying that used server and a couple of USB cables."

Perhaps the greatest beneficiaries, especially in this troubling economy, were IT professionals, who suddenly experienced a boon in what has been a lackluster business cycle. Although PC sales have been slow, internet security specialist have been busier than ever and the Twitter/Facebook attacks have done nothing but bolster the growing demand to ensure that our "friend requests" never slow down. Entrepreneurially enclined programmers now realize that by dividing their time between creating these attacks and by then resolving them, they'll now be able to ride out this economic downturn until the next boom cycle arrives.

One unfortunate side affect has been the renewed use of actual cell phone calls, along with the annoying "ring tones" and one-sided conversions, many of them loud beyond disbelief, that often accompany them. This trend is deemed temporary and is expected to return to a "honey, can you bring home some milk" traffic pattern immediately following Twitter and Facebook regaining full use of their networks.